Voices of strange busybodies could be heard on the other side of the edifice. Elaine reckoned she recognised one of them. An old friend. Perhaps not necessarily a friend, or not technically a friend. A friend is a rare commodity for her these days. She could walk right past them and not blink an eye, but Elaine waited for a little bit more until the lot toned down. Having a group of opposites around her, poking her skin through their eyes, meticulously making sure she was an enabler who to them an abundant source of entertainment, was all the reason needed to convince herself to back away from the complexity of it all. Home is an awful lot more awful than this place though, Elaine thought, as she gripped her handbag tightly, hoping the ray of darkness from the moon would envelope her and shield her from the attention of the lonesome trail.
"This would not have happened had you only listened to me, Elaine," complained Darco. "Half the people out there would skin us both…
Some things in my life are doing really good right now; so good, it's suspect. I smell a tragedy brewing in the background; waiting, brewing, gesticulating. I am scared but I am ready. My holidays starting tomorrow will be quite something then, if nothing else. Actually, someone else's holidays of which I merely am riding with their coattails on. But the real story is how the development of absolutely nothing has become the motif of me all of a sudden. This is my third pilgrimage now. Once, when all was lost. Second, when thought of love was found. And, finally, when hope reigned me in after thinking all was lost.
Of course, I am still that same old. It has been years long now since the first. I had to convince myself how terribly repetitive I really am. The joys of being mediocre at best.
If I could just draw luck and find another job before December, my anxiety would decrease tenfold. Tomorrow I have another registration with a new company. Hospitality and the same shit, over and over, again and again. Sick to death with a machination that clearly does not work to my favour, paining me with early terminations in a month or so, not even giving me any benefit of doubt. I am no asset to anyone, only to a rare few, and even then once my ooze sets in, no one dares to step in. I truly am alone. This realisation is the first time I have ever felt so isolated. Miriam clearly does not deserve me.
I fear for a future that my scarred self allows to happen. All I wanted was a place to call my own. But I am through and through a villain. Modern necessities share with me the desire to put myself above all others. Given the chance, I would see the world burn and left to snigger, eyes closed, no guns needed.
Behind closed doors, across distant worlds, day to night, I will retake the…