To be frank about this, I really have no idea what to say. I'm currently sitting on my bed as I have been doing for the past week now since this is part of my two-week holiday from class. This bumming isn't what I was hoping to do but since here I am, making the most out of it even barely making sense out of it, I'll just let it slip and hope to God everything will be for the better on the long run.
My head is feeling numb recently. As if a cacophony of discreet mobile vibrations were inside it, moving about and figuring out a way to dissect into my subconscious. It's a very annoying feeling, without any substance at all except misery and pain. I can't even use it to write the intended scripts properly. It's a curse, it is. This house. I just feel it in my gut. I know it.
Not all is bad though. Sometimes happiness comes in the form of invisible happiness from far away. Take, for instance: Johanna. Finally got herself to Finland all the way from Idaho. Such a lovely friend I met roaming around crawling the vast, tangled web. I was hooked the first moment I had with her, and never has this ever occurred to me. Never.
People can be nice in their own ways. There is this particular person whom I can't even slightly remember the name, but she sketched me something special. Something simple yet so appreciating to receive. This silly caricature of my alter-ego Paprika. Well I would have named her that directly if not for other people stealing that name in the process. Here it is in all its glory:
Now that the small pieces of the puzzle has cleared up, I think it's safe to assess the value of time. I was never good at making use of the time vested upon me, nor I think I will find any solution to this conflict of interest, but I think I can manage somehow. Not knowing when or how becomes the fundamental flaw however. As soon as my beauty rest comes to a full stop after this then I will try to figure something out. Hopefully make things a whole lot easier for all of us.
I have to worry as well on making something up for my pals in Saturday. Brazilian BBQ night all over again! Marvellous idea! I'm bringing something up on the table though I am not certain as to how I will be making the whole thing by myself. I need guidance by people familiar to this food mixing hullabaloo. My skills are far better off just the one consuming, but it would be shameful not to put my roundabout for others to enjoy. It's not like they've been taking from me my entire life since the get-go. I have to go and do groceries, and damn if I know what to buy for certain.