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Valentine's 묘선

Any way the wind blows.

I've been dealt a strong hand here. Celebratory days affect me the most. It started with the fireworks festival in Busan. Halloween came and nothing. Pepero Day pierced me within me like a sod on a spike. If a corkscrew could tighten a grip over the situation between me and my life, I'd be drowned in a bottle of grape juice. Nothing prepared me for anything. Living spontaneously is a hit and miss. It went on until Christmas and New Year. I went home as a bottle of bitter tears clinging to the rage and hopes and fears that keep me alive.

Tomorrow is Valentines. What use is it now to worry about its significance. Pepero Day was the same. I remember the look upon the mother when she found me from behind the glass door. She was stressfully dialling for someone, I don't know who. But from then on, time slowly greased away from my grasp tenfold. Weeks passed without any update. I was left to rot without a chance to know why.

Tomorrow I wonder if on the other side of the world a woman is happy that someone appreciates her love. A love so deep that the past pains will just subside and no sooner than later perish in an ecstasy of affection and sex. My date with time is full of stress and doubt. How much of patience should there be before an event transpires? Should I be worried and let go even if I cannot? I cannot, I just cannot, I will not, and I should not.

Not while the fluids in my body scream her name every step of the way.

Tomorrow is an opportunity to let go. With my bicycle, I shall rule the world, and all who cried with me will have salvation.

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