Le Contrebandier

There is an elephant in the room. I repeat, there is an elephant in the room. As we speak.

The silence itself is deafening, the awkwardness maddening. I want to engage the situation at hand headfirst, but I've been doing that since forever, making any effort now seems fruitless and forced. So should I suffer? Beat myself harder? Push myself into another trap?

She walks here and there, carelessly and callously. She seems to pay me no mind, as if nothing ever happened. Her mind is completely one-dimensional, and I knock my head to the wall for falling for this trickery. I deserve this because I entered this in the first place, never minding the consequences because I always believed I can just get over it all. I've made this wall myself. I thought there was nothing else to lose and now I'm losing what I never thought I could lose.

I've lost everything this time, and now I'll play the blame game.

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