El Desengaño

Love deep in this world-hardened shell,

I could never seem to figure out

Sometimes I come across an impasse

where all the triumphs and the burdens meet;

I don't know how to react

She came and all I did was act as if

the jouissance I felt was real and nothing

could take me further from the feeling that

I could be somebody who could be better

than someone I'm not;

Maybe I'm fooling myself

But the earnest effort I did helped

ease the burden I carried with me all along;

If this ends up in disgrace

If this whole thing dies in its place

If this little toying game

ends up in shame,

I want no more part of anything,

anything at all,

except the madness of my woe;

I'll thank her for the time, and wasting mine

My spirit will survive but die a cruel dive

And even if I will still learn to love again

It won't save me

from the perils of what's to come

and deep inside my shell

I will wait and bleed;